i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
