I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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