Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
