dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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