he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
