Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
