you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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