is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
