The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
