i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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