come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
