It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
