my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
