i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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