at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
