You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Randomize
