I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
After last night, I could never be a politician.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
