Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
vagina is talking i cant
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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