I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
