so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
