P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
