can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
