ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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