This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
