Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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