dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
