She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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