Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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