I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
