So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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