is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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