i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Randomize
