dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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