oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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