You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
