do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
