he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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