are you still at the devil's house?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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