She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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