I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
