i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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