I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
