That's intense
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
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