She is in my trunk
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He called his prostate his "boner button".
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
