Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
