the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
