You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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