he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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