Don't you send me to vm
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
