he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
