It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
